top of page

History

The tale of Moira O'Connor is a tragedy, and could be summarized as "actual god gamer's potential is squandered by low rolling into a crazy weird family with a, like, really demanding father." But that's probably not good enough for you, so let's break it down.

Moira O'Connor was born into a family that she likes to call "The Irish Hogwarts Mafia." It's a lot of bullshit, but the family tree puts Yggdrasil to shame, and if you ask her dad (Finnegan O'Connor) it comes with a whole lotta these lame things called "duty" and "honor". Moira probably would have ended up pretty good at those things if she wasn't such a natural born slacker, and if she was never introduced to old world pop culture. When she was young, she played Final Fantasy 7 at a neighbor kid named Steve's house and it was pretty much over from there. She would find any excuse to skip out on magic training with pops to go over and play Final Fantasy in Stevie's basement. When Stevie got a Playstation 2, he gave Moira his Playstation 1 and all of its games, and then things were REALLY fucked up. She didn't even sleep at night anymore! She started sleeping all day, because if she gamed at night, no one could bother her. Anyway, fast forward a bit, and by the time her and Stevie were high school age she had been staying at his house so often that when Big Stevie (Stevie was a junior) got a big time job in London and the Stevie family was moving, there was no question that Moira would come with. She was a part of the Stevie family by right of being who Big Stevie thought was his secretly very gay son's girlfriend. Surprise!

 

 

392938ec2b0d4555b6be04239dc73ad6.jpg

 

Essentially, Moira abandoned her family and the magic and all that familial honor without a word. She grew up in The Stevie Families attic, learned everything she knew off of the internet, and even got a job to pay for MMO subscriptions. When little Stevie went off to college, it wasn't long before Moira was no longer welcome in The Stevie family attic, so she ended up staying with someone from Berlin who she played Runescape with. She was able to freeload and couch surf from guild mate to guild mate until the ripe age of 26 , which is honestly really impressive. At that point she had run out of places to stay and people to mooch off of, and being homeless wasn't an option because her FFXIV FC needed her massive god gamer damage numbers, so she had to swallow her pride and call dad for an allowance.

Fucked up thing about that was that he was pretty upset that he hadn't heard a word from her in like, 13 years, so he arranged a trap for her. Moira thought she was going to go home and live in her old room and that'd buy her like, another couple decades of gaming, but pops was frankly really embarrassed that his daughter was an entire adult and couldn't even cast a mana spark. His solution to that was to ship her off to some community college hell hole named Ulreich where she was supposed to learn magic and watch over her little cousin Griffon, who she barely remembered on account of being asleep during most family functions. She wasn't too upset about being conscripted as baby sitter because she did remember him being an alright little kid, but she was super tilted to find out that the place where that community college hellhole was didn't have internet, or video games at all for that matter, which was super fucked up because she was actually super into Endwalker.

Anyway, that's where we're at now. Go Ulreich, or something.

bottom of page